Temple of Terror

Background -

Its still 1985.  The Fighting Fantasy series has come off two particular poor entries.  The publishing schedule is now causing quality issues.  I did not notice it when I was younger but looking back now they have not all been created equally!  Part of this has to be the move away from Fantasy and more specifically the move away from the budding Allansia.  Looking back out of the first 9 entries, 8 were set in this budding fantasy world.  It also includes the best world building entries (City of Thieves, Deathtrap Dungeon and to a lesser extent Island of the Lizard King and the early Citadel of Chaos and Forest of Doom).  We as readers were getting invested in this world.  But in the last four books we have moved away from that, with varying success.  I do not think having a different format or idea is a bad thing, in fact when done well (House of Hell) it is a great change of pace.  But they have to be sprinkled in.  Four in a row was too much and especially two non fantasy ones in a row.  I always preferred the Allansia ones when I was younger and since doing these reviews I am starting to understand why a lot better.  

So its with this backdrop I am delighted that we are heading back with Temple of Terror to where I think Fighting Fantasy is at its best, the setting of Allansia!  I really hope this is a good one for the sake of momentum of this blog!

Interestingly the working title is believed to be Dragon Master, which is a much more bad ass title but I wonder if even this early they were looking to do more of the something of something titles.

Covers - 

Ah the classic snakeman guard!  It is a shame that we only get a tiny glimpse of the city of Vatos through the gate behind him.  I would have liked to see more of that vista.

But the real question here is what has caused the sheer look of shock and surprise on the snake mans face?!

I've taken the liberty of coming up with some potential answers to this long asked question.

• We can not see the tail end of the snake man.  I can only assume it has been inadvertently trod on by a clumsy adventurer who has just failed a luck roll while trying to creep past.
  
  
• He has just slithered over the Allansian equivalent of a Lego brick.
  
  
• The revelation while he is out on patrol has just hit him that he has left the hearth on at home (medieval equivalent of leaving the hob on).   And that his shack is now probably a smoldering ruin.
  
  
• News has just broken that Malbordus has run his enterprise into the ground, wizards are not known for making great financial decisions, and the henchman (henchsnake) pension program has collapsed.
  
  
• This is actually him coming home.  It was a quite day and the boss let him slither home early.  But as he comes through the door he sees his wife, Mrs Snake, in a compromising position with his best friend, Anaconda Bob from accounts!

The Wizard reprint cover is very disappointing though.  In a book full of unique creatures and environments we instead get a close up of a generic Orcs face.  This could be the cover for a huge amount of Fighting Fantasy titles.  I would have loved to see the snakman get the modern treatment!  

The worst thing about this is this is exactly what Ian asked for!  Far too generic for me.

Now to me favorite part, the US cover.  Always good for a cheap laugh and to make the blog a lot easier.  So looking at Temple of Terror....wait....what?  Oh no....no...it cant be.....

So the US covers apparently from here just use the same art as the rest of the world.  While this makes sense from a commercial point of view, from a comedy blog stance, its devastating.

Premise - 

We are first introduced to Malbordus, who we are told straight away has an evil nature.  The reason for this evil nature is guessed at being because he was born during a full moon with wolves howling around the hut.  I am not buying this for a second.  Its clearly the result of bad parenting.  And literally the next line tells that his mother abandoned him.  Yep that settles it, crap parenting.

Instead he is raised by Darkside Elves of Darkwood Forest.  I've been there and surprisingly did not run into any of them.   The young Malbordus showed a penchant for magic by making plants wither and die and also controlling animals with his piercing gaze.  The evil elves encouraged this and want to give him the power of the ancient elven lords.  This magic is so vile that it kills the unworthy.  So in order to prove he is worthy the elves send him off to the Desert of Skulls, there to find the lost city of Vatos.  He has to find the five dragon artifacts hidden there and turn them into dragons to lead the armies of the chaos to rampage across Allansia.  Is this the first time Allansia is named?

I imagine Malbordus is rolling up his stats about now and picking his spells.  I wonder if he also is given provisions?

But news of this quest has reached our old friend Yaztromo who I learn only sells magic trinkets to pay for cakes.  He arrives in Stonebridge looking for a hero to undertake a quest to stop the other quest.  Almost an anti quest.  Luckily I am in Stonebridge fresh off a quest of my own.  This is clearly meant to be a sequel to Forest of Doom but in that one I was killed by bandits on my way back round to the start of the forest so my guy must be someone else.  There is after all a lot of solo questing going on around here.  

None of the Dwarfs volunteer.  Does not shock me, these guys couldn't even get their sh*t together to find a hammer.  So I volunteer and Yaztromo thinks he has met me before.  Nope that guys body is still carrion food on the east side of the forest.  And to be honest he was a bit crazy so I think you are better off without him.

With that we head off back into Darkwood Forest with the wizard heading to his tower.

Playthrough - 

Rules wise we are back to vanilla Fighting Fantasy which is fine with me.  10 provisions are packed but there is a difference.  No potion is made available at the start.  I wonder if this is Ian trying to make the books harder? 

Equipment wise we start with a sword and leather armour.  I also have a lantern to light my way.  But here is where it gets interesting.  I am carrying a rucksack and in brackets it says haversack, backpack!  Readers from the start will remember (maybe) that I used to make a big deal about this.  Which one is it Ian?  He was obviously concerned enough when he wrote it to include them all!  I want to know what this rucksack/backpack/haversack hybrid looks like!

Which one is it Ian!!??

Anyway they all look quite awkward for any kind of combat.  I resolve to ask any opponents for a moment while I prepare by removing the cumbersome garment from my person.

This excessive tangent may have been caused by a lack of anything to talk about in the setup.

There is a section for spells though.....

Skill - 10

Stamina - 19

Luck - 10

Pretty average but thats ok, would rather that than a Skill 7 which miraculously I still haven't had to deal with.

Yaz just saunters through the forest!

We make it back to the tower after camping out in the forest overnight.  We do not have one encounter.  When I ask Yaztromo why he says the creatures of the forest respect his magic.  It just makes me think what a dick he is since he could have got the hammer from Forest of Doom himself!  

Yaz tells me that he will teach me some magic spells since I am going up against Malbordous.  Ah yep I am sure getting taught four spells quickly by a wizard will be a match for someone thats been taught magic all his lives by Darkside elves and is on the verge of learning their elder magic.

The choice of spells are -

Open Door

Creature Sleep

Magic Arrow

Language

Read Symbols

Light

Fire

Jump

Detect Trap

Create Water

Well I am going to a desert and Freeway Fighter is fresh on my mind so first up its create water.  Which apparently is free to cast.  Since this is an Ian Livingston book and ill need to do a lot of searching Detect Trap is next up.  Open Door appeals to me so I pick that.  

This is quite a choice and I like how its limited.  Creature Sleep. Magic Arrow and Fire sound combat related to me so I decide to leave them off.  Jump sounds like one that will get me out of bother but hopefully with detect trap I wont get into any bother that requires me to jump.  Light feels like a waste since I already have a lantern.  So its between Language and Read Symbols.  I really want both but not ahead of the three I have already picked.  I plumb for language.  

And with that I am a part time Wizard.  As its so easy to learn no wonder Allansia is swimming in evil wizards!  

Yaz says basically we have two options, overland through the Desert of Skulls or go to Port Blacksand and sail from there.  His pet crow will guide me as far as the catfish river where I will need to make that choice.  He then gives me 25 gold pieces as a parting gift.

This may sound super generous but if the fate of the world is really resting on this mission.  I am sure I could have been kitted out better, or I don't know, hire an army to stop him.  Or at the very least send a highly skilled and levelled up D&D party?

Yeah these boys look reputable.

So its basically take the bridge to head towards the desert or see if these guys can take me to Port Blacksand.  Now I am thinking I do have my create water spell so the desert should make sense.  But I can not resist a trip to the City of Thieves.  I enjoyed that book a lot so keen to see if we get any more info on it.  

I go to meet the captain (sounds like a proper boat as opposed to the tiny one in the picture) and he offers me passage for 5 gold.  I dont want them to know I am loaded so try and haggle and get it down to 3.  And with that we set sail!

We soon arrive without incident and I say goodbye to the crew and make my way into Port Blacksand.  Before I have even got an option on which way to go a strange old man jumps out of an alley and offers to take me somewhere with a good bed and food for only 1 gold piece.  Luckily I have spoken to a friend of mine who got a tattoo on his forehead when he was here last so I decline his offer knowing anything anyone offers me here will not be in my best interest.

I make my way to Black Lobster tavern and get a room for one gold piece.  Asking about a ship that can take me to my destination costs me another gold piece.  I meet with a mate of the Belladonna, Gardo who says they will take me for 10 gps but I have to work for food.  On the way to my room I bump into an angry man and spill his grog.  Not wanting to cause a scene I use another gold piece to pay for replacements.  I lose a luck point for this.

So all in all I am already down to 9 gold.  But at least I have passage.  After a terrible nights sleep being bitten by fleas (at least no stamina loss) I make my way to the Belladonna.  Which turns to be a pirate ship!  I wonder if its the one I stole the black pearl from in a previous life.

I get a job on the gunnery deck loading the cannons and straight away we run into our first fight.  And the Man O'War sinks us without me having to make a choice or roll a dice.  A successful skill roll means I make it out just as the ship sinks.  I can either hold onto the mast and drift away which sounds like it should be from Castaway or swim over to the ship that sunk us.  

Well they might think I am a pirate but my quest will save the world so I am sure they will understand.  And floating around sounds like a good way to die to me.  They pull me up and I try and explain so they ask me who the King of Stonebridge is to validate my story.  Now I am telling the truth and I know its Gillibran but I have no idea why having this knowledge validates my story.  

I am not complaining though as these nice fellows feed me well and restore my provisions (which I assume I would have lost when the ship went down) and take me two days further down the coast before dropping me off.

Finally I am in the desert, hopefully a lot further than if I had walked.  I can head East to go  inland or South along the coast.  I decide to hug the coast line for now.  I arrive at a beach with a pattern of shells.  There is a spear with feathers at the centre.  Can you read symbols?  Sigh, no, no I cant.  I plumbed for language instead.  I decide to head inland instead of risk it.

This change of direction leads to my first combat (since I did not go for magic arrow).  Three needle flies attack me and rather kindly they are very sporting and fight me one at a time.  I rather un-sportingly kill them.  One does land a hit though.

I find a dead body in the desert clutching a pouch.  Now normally I would be like no chance but of course we need to search everything in case its got a dragon statue in it.  Its a small golden key.  Onward we trek!

Could I buy that Camal for 9 gold?

They try to sell me some water by trading for items I do not have but I am like haha I can make water for free.  I then get caught in a sandstorm and while I am waiting it out I decide to eat a meal.  Once its has finished I find a brass hand bell, just sitting there in the middle of the desert.  My luck is already down to 8 though.  

Its at this time the desert starts to take its toll and I get asked if I have water.  I use my create water spell though and laugh to myself.  No running out of petrol in the desert this time Livingstone!

I then meet a nomad merchant who gives me food and water.

Yep every time I eat a provision its a waste.  This guy has the most bizarre collection of items ever on offer.  Disappointingly that's not a hand grenade.  I decide to splurge and spend all my gold.  I pick up an Onyx Egg, a Bracelet of Mermaid Scales and an Ebony Mask.  Why these items you ask, well they all cost 3 gold and with 9 gold left I took it as a sign.

He tells me to head South.  Which leads me straight into the film set of Dune.

I may be in a bit of bother here.

Its skill 10 and stamina a whopping 20.  I only have 19 stamina so its a straight roll off and first to 10 wins.  After a startling amount of draws I am reduced to 1 stamina point and I am pretty sure this is the end before winning three combats in a row to take down the worm in what has to be the most epic fight I have had so far.  

Despite it looking very gummy in the illustration I take one of its teeth as a prize and sit down to eat four meals in a row.  All this eating takes time and the desert turns to night where it is cold.  As I don't know the fire spell that's another three stamina points lost so I eat another meal.  Just as well I met that ship or that cold night would have been game over without provisions.

The book then tries to tempt me with an oasis but as I can make water appear on a whim I ignore it and carry on the trek south.  Once again the water spell refreshes me.  But I am not wearing a headscarf and end up suffering from sun stroke and losing a skill point!  I do burn very easily.  Photos exist of me on holiday in Portugal looking like Emperor Palpatine with a towel over my head.  I should have known better.

Finally Vatos!

At least that's what the voice in my head says.  This in reality could be any place.  It is very much wishful thinking on my characters part.  I am delirious with sun stroke after all.  With no jump spell its over to the door.

I burn two stamina points using the open door spell and finally I am in the city.  Ill be honest, this book has kicked my ass so far so I am not in the best of shape.  I wonder across the courtyard and descend into a tunnel and instantly get offered to open an iron casket.  Well got to find those dragon statues so I go for it.  No dragon this time, just an iron helmet.  I put it on and get my lost skill point back!  This was very much needed!

This was very much not needed!

So this guy is the messenger of death and one of Malbordus's assassins.  All he does is whisper sexily in your ear the word death and disappears.  My character knows whats up.  This boy is now going around hiding letters that spell the word death around the place.  If I find them all he pops back up and insta kills me.  So I am already having to search everywhere and now there is a chance I turn up these letters instead.

If I was Malbordus though I would be a bit upset that my paid assassin just does not kill me straight up with his power instead of giving me a chance with this game.

Its the first dreaded t-junction next but with a twist.  I also get the option to pull on some drapes.  Well looks like I better.  It reveals a door so I go in.

Ok what is going on in here?

The Giant Centipede is skill 9 and he gets a few hits in before I kill it.  More eating and I am down to my last two meals.  I cut down the bucket and find my first dragon statue!  Its a bone one.  I have to ask questions who decided best place to hide it was in a bucket tied to the celling under a giant centipede.  Maybe it was Baron Sukumvit.

Another T-Junction but this time my man decides nothing exciting left or right so heads straight ahead, straight towards a pit which I do not have a jump spell for.  I make the jump thanks to my skill and continue on.

The early 80s fantasy landscape was obsessed with floating eyes.

I get the option to look in my backpack for an item and the only one I have listed is an Onyx Egg.  I have no idea how this would help but try it anyway since its an option and amazingly it works and the eye closes and I get past.

Next is an iron grill which I decide to try and prize open, only to realise that its in the shape of the letter H.  One dragon, one Death letter.  It also costs a luck point and 4 stamina so its time for another meal!  One left.

And its the non descript T-Junction of doom again.  Just left or right, no hints or anything.  So I head left.  Which takes me to a Lizard man guarding some sacks.  He gets some licks in but I beat him.  And for the first time in these blogs I have used every one of my provisions.  God I miss that potion of strength!  I find an Iron Key on him and get another non descript left or right.  I mix it up and head right.

Skaven..erm I mean Ratmen!

These guys are only skill 5 which I am not complaining about at all!  But its strange to have that at this stage of the adventure rather than at the start.  Its been a cavalcade of skill 9's so far.  I net 3gp and a monkeys tail from them.  Another left or right without any clues.  I decide to go left.

Oh joy another T-junction with just a cold left or right option.  Well I have decided to just go opposite of last one each time so right this time.  

The Chuckle Brothers attack simultaneously. 

Luckily they are not too tough so I dont take any hits.  I pick up a shield from them to add 1 skill point.  But I am at my initial skill.  It really should be +1 in combat rolls.

I get to use my open door spell again and I find a clay goblet with a heart which I put in my bag.  Which by the way must be overflowing as I've had to move onto my second column on my equipment chart!

Another door, another one I feel I cant ignore.

And back onto the skill 9s

Its a death dog!  He also gets some bites in and I am down to stamina 10 before I put him down.  I see a tunnel in the room and crawl into it.  I have to burn a precious 2 stamina points on a detect traps spell but at least it helps me avoid the crossbow that is waiting in the dark.  

So I enter the dusty room and I am beset by terrible visions where I think I am being burned alive.  I pass out and wake up hours later.  My punishment for this.  Minus 3 skill points.  Honestly what's the point of going on after that.  I decide my shield counts as plus 1 now so I only deduct 2.  But still its all going to be over soon. 

I run into some Giant Fireflies, which normally would be easy but my reduced skill puts me in big danger.  And if they land a hit they have a 50/50 chance of discharging electricity for an additional 2 points of damage.

This happens once so I am now skill 8, stamina 4.  Hanging on by a thread.

Every encounter is now terrifying.

You get the option to walk past on the left or right.  I am going right as its the side the hammer is not facing.  This seems to work and we continue on.  I am forced into some murky water next and get attacked by some tentacles like I was on the Vandervecken.  My mermaid scale bracelet though saves the day and scares the creature off without a combat!

Hello sir, do you know the way to the dragon statues...oh my god your face!

So the Phantom stares at me which is apparently bad.  I roll 5 for my skill test so despite my punished skill score I survive his withering stare.  I look in my overflowing backpack/rucksack/haversack for an item to deal with him but I have nothing listed.  So its a physical fight.  My sword goes straight through him and he paralyzes me.  Which also costs me 4 stamina points.... which kills me.  The text says by the time feeling returns to my limbs the phantom is well out of sight and I walk stiffly along the tunnel.  Nope sorry book you did not take into account this killing me.

What I do instead is a few things.  First I take solace that the armies of chaos will only have four dragons instead of five.  Secondly I curse Yaztromo and all the "Good" people for woefully underestimating the size of this task and hope they all get wiped out.  Finally I do all these cursing in another language frustrated I never got to use my language spell I spent so long learning.

Notable Encounters - 

Yet again we get teased by being able to fly around on the back of a giant eagle.  It does not last long as a pesky Pterodactyl shows up which can lead to an instant death.  The eagle then gives up and drops you at the desert before heading away.  I mean its not like he could possibly fly you to Vatos.

This guy happily collects nik naks.  

You can of course kill the Gnome in cold blood.  But that would be a shame as he has found a crystal dragon!  

Vatos is full of strange people just wandering around.  One such example is an artist just sitting in the corridor doing his thing.  He is just like, hey like my art?  And you can say yes its great or no its a bit crap.  Of course if you do not like it he gets all pouty.  

In another interesting scene that has not aged well, you go through a shower of golden rain.  Now in this book that takes away your ability to cast spells.  But it does not tell you this until you try to cast a spell.  But it says you do not realise this but the book tells you thats what happened.  And then you can keep trying as your character does not know, even if you do!  If you are wondering why it has not aged well, do not google it!

This is a very bizarre set up. 

I have no idea who would have thought, I know lets set up a corridor with slashing sword arms.  Where do you even go to purchase something like that?  What kind of contractors do you have to call to put this in?  I can just imagine the joiner going well that's the killer sword corridor done, now to put in that new kitchen.

Leesha runs the joint.

Leesha is in charge of Vatos, so much so that even Malbordus needs her help.  She has a penchant for art and everyone turns up to win her 300 gold pieces.  No pressure though, if you do not win she kills you.  Better have kept hold of that sandworm tooth otherwise its an instant kill.  Best you can do is make her run away, you never end up fighting her.

Luckily some other hero retrieved the Dwarfs hammer from Darkwood Forest. 

So right at the very end this Dwarf shows up.  He has come with the Kings hammer which is what you need to destroy the dragon statues.  So couple of questions I have here - 

1) If the hammer was the only thing that could destroy the dragons why did they not give it to you before you headed out.

2) How did the Dwarf get ahead of you?  Ive been running around trying to get to Vatos via pirate ships, deserts etc.  And this guy just shows up in the middle of Vatos!?  That bloody eagle must have take him all the way.

3) Why didn't they just send this guy instead of me?  He got further than I did!

Artwork - 

Bill Houston is the artist and I think this is his only Fighting Fantasy book.  From the playthrough the Messenger of Death and the Phantom are great.  I really like the Death Dog as well.  

That time I got up in the morning and looked out of the window...

This guy is pretty badass if ever slightly stereo typical.

Overall its pretty good.  Its not top level and we have seen better in the series but I certainly think its above average.  Or it might be that after Freeway Fighter anything looks magnificent by comparison.  There are some dubious ones though - 

The burning building is a bit questionable.

The disciples are still all wearing their matching onesies. 

Tentacles are not his strong point.

The Big Bad - 

For some reason my brain keeps auto correcting to this fellow - 

With the amount of tentacles in this book it would have made sense.

But it is not the Malboro from Final Fantasy but Malbordus.  Another evil wizard.

That Emo kid at your school when he grows up.

Ian actually does a good job of establishing his background and motivations.  The book does a good job of keeping him in mind as well as your character is constantly wondering if Malbordus has been here, or if he is ahead of you.  There are a couple of failure scenarios where you see him flying away on one of his dragons.  

For a wizard though he only cast one spell.  Better be wearing a copper ring or its straight up -3 skill.  But then its straight onto swordplay which I found a bit strange.  He has Skill 10 and Stamina 18 which is a tough fight because by this stage you have been pummeled by the book.  Also if he wins the first three combat rounds its an instant kill.  I would have liked to have seen more from this battle rather than a straight up fight.  But overall an underrated big bad in the history of Fighting Fantasy.

But you do not care about any of that.  You are asking yourself the same question we all are.  What is in the hole?

So if you get to this stage you have all the dragons which means old Malbordus has been grubbing around Vatos for days and not found any.  I assume he was desperately searching in the hole on the off chance of finding a dragon.  Or he has been waiting in it on the off chance of having a spooky entrance?  Maybe he was rigging a fog machine for it but you arrived too early.  Another possibility is that as he is on his own adventure he failed a luck test and just fell in the hole?  No doubt -3 skill points.  How deep even is the hole?  Has he levitated up using magic?  Is it just normal sized.  Or is he on his knees giving a cool illusion of him slowly rising up like a cheap magician?  I have so many questions, any ideas please fire them in the comments.

Menagerie - 

Temple of Terror falls a bit foul of the old slap the world Giant in front of it.  We get the Giant Eagle, Giant Centipede, Giant Fireflies and of course the Giant Sandworm.

Apart form that there is no real theme here and we see all the stereotypes.  A few even have unique combat rules to make it interesting (IE harder).  Not all can be fought with conventional methods though.  Sometimes you need an item from your back back which a lot of the times makes no sense.

Hmm maybe should have put this in the bad art section for the priest pose.

If you looked at this you have already turned to stone.

If you are distracted by the bright reflections on the swords he has already killed you.

This Mutant Orc is an Assassin and will kill you as he has Skill 11 and unless you have a dagger you have to reduce your attack strength by 2.  Best to just avoid him.

One of my favorites though is the Night Horror.  He has a unique fight which you will need an item for.  You can brute force it but he is Skill 10 and you only have a 50% chance of hurting him.  But worse is every time he hits you it is -1 Skill as well as the stamina loss.

He also rather sensibly keeps shooting at you as you rummage in your backpack.  Not sporting at all. 

This guy coupled with the Messenger of Death and the Phantom add some good uniqueness to the encounters to keep it more interesting than the normal fantasy staples.  

Entertaining Deaths - 

So So many in this book - 

Attacking an unarmed artist.  Turns out he has an invisible shield causing your own sword to kill you.

Getting the Dwarf Kings name wrong and being thrown overboard.

Dropping a key made of crystal which shatters.  Unfortunately its the key to get out of the room with a descending ceiling and you are crushed to death.  

Going outside and getting locked out.  But you get to see Malbordus fly off on his dragon.

Knocking yourself out as you try and escape a sinking ship and drowning.

Looking at a Basilisk.

Being blown to death by a Wind Elemental.

Getting stung by a eye stinger and being petrified.  The guard take you away to become a gargoyle.

Being shelled to death by a shell monster.

Wearing a medallion of sacrifice and then getting sacrificed.

And of course finding all the letters of death.  

But the award for this book goes to killing a tentacle monster.  Sounds ok but its blood mixes with the water which of course causes an acidic reaction.  And you fall into the water after hanging around too long.

Petes Corner - 

You really should start riding Pterodactyls instead of Giant Eagles.

Final Thoughts - 

Well Temple of Terror is tough, very tough.  It maybe should be called Temple of Skill penalties.  But that tends to be the model of the best Ian Livingston books so far like Deathtrap Dungeon.  After mapping it out this book has a very narrow path to success.  But I understand why.  Ian obviously wanted people to have to play multiple times to find how to win. It adds replay value to the book so people feel they get their monies worth.  This is achieved by having the need for certain items, tough combats and punishing penalties.  Ill be honest I did not feel I was enjoying this book that much during my playthrough as it was such a battle for survival.  But after I mapped it out I started to like it a lot more.

My favorite thing about Ian's books is his world building.  The background is once again top notch and pulling old favorites like Yaztromo, Stonebridge and the hammer back into it along with new aspects like Malbordous, the Dragons and Vatos really pulled me in.  

Early on we had not seen Ian change from the standard Fighting Fantasy formula either.  He obviously did for Freeway Fighter last time out but introducing magic in this adventure was a new twist for him.  I like that it cost stamina to use magic so you had to think if it was worth it.  I chose very poorly though as I am pretty sure the Language spell is not in the book at all!

In the adventure itself getting to Vatos is quite fun and I loved the difference in the two different routes.  They feel completely different but it was a bit gutting to find you have to go one way or its game over.  If you don't get the telescope you can't trade it for one of the dragons.  I feel this is a bit unfair as it would be better to give players the option of going different ways.  Might be a better way to add replay value.

The desert trek itself is what you would expect.  But it does have more interesting encounters than I expected.  Just make sure to take that water spell!  However my biggest problem with the book is in this section.  The Giant Sandworm is far too tough an enemy at this stage.  It is an epic fight but he is unavoidable and low skill characters might as well roll up again.  It really needs some kind of non combat option as well to make it more fair for lower skill characters.  

I fell Vatos itself is a bit if a missed opportunity.  When you arrive I got excited to explore but immediately you get railroaded underground.  I understand the format lends itself to dungeon crawling but Ian has already proved in City of Thieves he can write a fantastic city format.  We also get a few of the dreaded T-Junctions of doom!  But the addition of knowing you have to search for artifacts helps make decisions for you.  Normally you look at a suspect area and think no chance I am risking that but here you have to and it makes sense.  

But throw in the messenger of death as well and each exploration adds a lot more tension to each encounter which is really well done.

I do wish though there was more to the Malbordus encounter.  It would make more sense to have some kind of magic duel or something before it resorts to a standard fight.  But there is a lot of tough combat in this book.  There are no crazy skill 12 though but a lot of Skill 9 and 10 with high stamina.  Not having that potion of strength really hurts here.  Although the real killer is the skill penalties.

Overall though as punishing as this book is, it is still fun.  Well if you like tough gamebooks and are willing to do more playthroughs to learn the safe route to take.  I like the story part more and I enjoyed the story here.  Although we do have one massive plot hole.  How did that Dwarf get ahead of you?

Yaztromo "Dont worry King Gillibran, I am sure the random guy we just met will stop the greatest threat to the known world we have seen."

King Gillibran "I do not know Yaztromo, If this threat is as big as you say we should have marched my armies to stop it.  It seems quite a gamble."

Yaztromo "Worry ye not!  I find random adventurers are very reliable.  Besides if you marched your armies the Darkside Elves would do the same.  This way they have them at a disadvantage as they have no idea we are trying to stop them."

King Gillibran "Yes but we know nothing of this adventurer, not even his name!"

Yaztromo "Need I remind you it was a random adventurer that got your hammer back when it was lost in Darkwood Forest?"

King Gillibran "How many died before that?"

Yaztromo "Semantics my lord.  The point is we got the hammer back, which will allow our new hero to destroy the dragon artifacts!"

King Gillibran "You mean this hammer?"

Yaztromo "Aww Sh....."

Cut to a few hours later

King Gillibran "I have summoned my most loyal Dwarf, he will take the Hammer to Vatos"

Yaztromo "I have my most loyal Great Eagle, he will fly him straight to the city."

King Gillibran "Why did you not just fly the last guy there?"

Yaztromo "He was human, too heavy.  Would have at best got to the edge of the desert."

King Gillibran "Ah makes sense.  Well do not worry, my guy is a hero and he will use the hammer to destroy the dragon artifacts."

Yaztromo "Oh no, I just need him to give the hammer to the guy we sent."

King Gillibran "Why?  My guy will be fresher and will no doubt get there first?"

Yaztromo "Principle, its just how things are done around here."

Score - 7 out of 10. 

 

Freeway Fighter

Background -

Ian's friends have arrived at his house.  Repeated knocks at the door go unanswered.  Concern grows as they have not heard from Ian in quite some time.  They try the door and its unlocked.  Warily they make their way through the house.  Its a mess!  Scrunched up paper lies everywhere, discarded ideas flood the property.  Strange noises are heard from upstairs but before they can investigate they hear a groan as Ian stirs from the typewriter.  

Friend "Ian, come on!  This has gone too far!  Look at the state of you!"

Ian groans "Must....finish...manuscript..."

Friend "Good god man you have published 6 books, you need a break"

Ian "Puffin....must keep going."

Friend "Look one night off is not going to make any difference.  We are going to the cinema.  You should come with us."

Ian "Maybe, I guess you are right.  What are you going to see?"

Friend "That's the spirt Ian!  Its the new Mad Max Film!"

Fast forward to the next morning and Ian is on the phone to Puffin.

Ian "I am telling you Phillipa its a big money idea.  Mad Max plus gamebooks, we have to get that license!"

Phillipa "And I am telling you Ian there is no way we are going to pay for a film license, they charge silly money!"

Ian "But it will be worth it!"

Phillipa "No it wont!  Look Ian we just cant.  But that does not mean you cant do something similar."

Ian "What do you mean?"

Phillipa "Well make some tweaks so its similar but just different enough so we don't get sued."

Ian "Oh ok I get it, like call it Crazy Chris?"

Phillipa "Yes but something better."

Ian "Psychotic Phil, Delirious Dave, Foolish Fred."

Phillipa "Just send me the manuscript when its ready and ill sort that out."

Fast forward a few weeks and the manuscript arrives at Puffin.  Phillipa looks at the title of Ludicrous Larry and scores it out.  Replacing it with Freeway Fighter.

So it might not quite have gone down like this but it is clear that Freeway Fighter is a Mad Max clone.  To be fair the story is similar to the second Mad Max 2 the Road Warrior which came out in 1982.  But Freeway Fighter came out in 1985, same year as Beyond the Thunderdome.  I do not think this is a coincidence!    

Covers - 

Now bearing in mind that its 1985 I do like the font.  It looks a bit more futuristic.   The car also looks pretty bad ass.  Alas its not my car.  Although I question the drivers visibility.  And why does everyone in dystopian futures wear black leather?  Is it easier to acquire? 

As this was an Ian Livingston original Wizard books republished it as part of their line.  Car looks interesting but I am not convinced.  I do like the strange sky colours behind it though.  But wait just a minute....

Look Familiar?

Yep its just a touched up version of a 1984 ZX Spectrum game also released by Games Workshop.  A bit disappointed that they never came up with something more original.

Now we are talking!

 

Now rather disappointingly the US Cover is probably the best overall.  It looks like your Dodge Interceptor.  And of course in typical Fighting Fantasy fashion the entire world is out to get you.  Including a helicopter!  But yeah, probably my favorite of the three.

Premise - 

Instead of the background we get the futuristic Vid News Bulletin 21 July 2022.  Well I am typing this exactly one month later on the 21st of August 2022.  Gutted I've missed it by a month or I would have played it on the same date!  So it was 37 years into the future so lets see how close to Nostradamus Ian actually was.

World war three has just been avoided and the power blocs of east and west are working towards peace and harmony.  

Well not so close there as Vladimir Putin seems intent on bringing back the Soviet Union and we are months into a terrible war in the Ukraine.  Hopefully Ian just jumped the gun and once this is over his prediction comes true.

Revolutionary farming techniques have all but eradicated world hunger.  

Alas not even close.  Farming has improved but not by enough to solve world hunger.  Maybe if we stopped fighting each other for more than five minutes we would have got closer.

Increased mobility has led to peoples greater understanding of each other.

Will give Ian this one, might not be mobility but the Internet has definitely helped understanding (and hate) and random blogs about 80s gamebooks.

Solar Energy now powered 90% of homes and 70% of industry.

Nope we are still massively reliant on fossil fuels and nuclear.  Although the change to renewables is happening now, but will probably be another 37 years to get that kind of numbers.  And it might be too late by then.

The three day working week was now the norm.

Be still my beating heart!  Oh Ian how I wish you were right about this one.  Forget world peace and ending huger, this is the one.   But no, still slogging through five days a week.  Imagine how much more entries I could do with only a three day week!

England v USA in the World cup final in Australia.  

Ian could not have possibly known about the sheer corruption of FIFA which would lead to the world cup being in winter in Qatar this year.  As for the teams, well normally I would insert a joke about England being terrible but thy have come dangerously close the last few years and I don't want to jinx it.  

But in our book here a disease breaks out in New York and within four days 85% of the worlds population is dead.  There is not enough people left alive to work out what caused it.  Well after the world going through Covid in the last two years this one is dangerously close.  I like how Ian does not give a reason as if he had said someone ate a bat we would have lambasted such a ridiculous premise.  

Fast forward 6 months after the looting and killing for cans of beans and the world has separated into two types.  One type have had to create new towns and cities (the previous ones being inhabitable due to lack of food and disease) and the other type full of the bad guys who live in the wild as the new barbarians.  

I happen to fall into the first type and living in a nice place called New Hope, working on some kind of early warning system.  However the town elders have struck a deal with another community that have set up in an oil refinery.  They have got loads of fuel but not enough grain.  Guess what, we have grain but not enough fuel so I am to take a sack of grain down to San Angelo and then drive a tanker with 10,000 litres of petrol back home.  

Apparently I do not need convincing as I can see the benefit.  For once I would like the option to say no and the book turns you to another page which just says you live for another 20 years quite happily.  

But when they tell me about my sweet ride how can anyone resist.  It will be a Dodge Interceptor with machine guns, radio, roof mounted rocket launcher, ram bars, loudspeaker, oil spray, tyre shredding spikes, armour plating and bullet proof windows!  Even James Bond does not get all this.  Well maybe he does.  

Over the next two days I supervise the car setup.  When ready I check all the equipment.  Map (No GPS in this world), flashlight, med kits, compass, food, water, fuel canister, spare wheels, and a fancy puncture repair kit.  That is a lot of kit.  

Finally looking out the tiny slit of a screen I roll out of town with everyone waving me goodbye.  Its been over a year since I have been outside the town.  Quick question, with all that kit in the car where is the grain?  Its not even mentioned!  Did I even remember to take it?  

Playthrough - 

OK we have quite a few new rules to check in with.  Instead of the usual add 12 to your roll for stamina its add 24 which is quite the total!  The car gets it own stats.  Firepower which is how good the guns are (Car Skill) and Armour (Car stamina).  I am told the machine guns have unlimited bullets which means I must have a huge amount of ammunition in the car.  No wonder I had no room for the grain.

You get four rockets, three cans of spikes and two rear mounted oil sprays.  The book will guide you when they can be used but the rockets you can use to auto win a vehicle combat.  

Hand to Hand fighting works the same as normal but you only lose 1 stamina point per hit.  Interestingly first to lose 6 stamina points is knocked unconscious and the combat ends.  

Shooting is the same as normal combat but damage is 1d6.  Disappointed in this as I really liked the shooting mechanism in Space Assassin where each person did a skill test rather than here where its attack strength v attack strength.  

Vehicle Combat works exactly the same as shooting but instead you use the cars stats rather than your own.

Looks like you get ten medi kits which each restore the normal four points of stamina.  And you start with 200 credits which is current money.  

The adventure sheet I think is meant to look like a car - 

The Dodge Looks more like a tank

You also get a place to name your character and the person who owned my book took full advantage of.

Speed Flyer!

So yeah ill go with that name!

Skill - 10

Stamina - 31

Luck - 11

Firepower - 7

Armour - 34

Well I think I need to speak to the team that set up the car.  Firepower 7?  What kind of guns are we using.  I resolve to shoot everything with the missiles instead.  

Also there is place for fuel.  Now the book does not mention fuel much in the build up but from reading other blogs in the past I know it is a very precious resource and the end of many playthroughs.

The Dodge in all its erm glory

I hit the open road and marvel at how much the world has fallen into decay already.  I stop at a town 15km away and my character decides getting out would be a mistake.  I mean yeah its not been far!  But I hear a shotgun go off and get the option to investigate.  Haha no chance, off I drive.

I drive on down the road avoiding all the obstacles and arrive at a garage.  

 

So I can talk to her or drive on.

Now Ian is clearly targeting the young males who would read this book.  But she looks a lot more, erm, haunted in the picture than I believe he was picturing in his head.  Also its a garage just outside New Hope, the place that is desperate for petrol.  Clearly a trap.  I say no thank you mam and wheelspin out of there. 

I manage to reach 190kph and feel the freedom of not being bound by any rules.  Careful there that's new barbarian thinking!  Then the red Chevrolet from cover rolls into view and I start to think that having the police around would be a good thing.

Lets take a minute to take in the sweeping vista of the lone tree outline.

Its Firepower is 8 so its already better than my car so I press the missile button and wipe it out.  Everything really kicks off then as I get a message over the radio from New Hope.  Its been attacked and 8 people have been killed.  But the main part of the story is that the Mayor Sinclair has been kidnaped!  

I of course assume its Sir Clive Sinclair, this is 80s Britain after all.  Pictured in his C5 car, appropriate for a gamebook about cars!

But its now I realise I am running out of petrol and use my spare canister to fuel the car.  That is not a good sign.  The Highway is blocked and I now have the famous T-Junction!  No indication or clue but its east or west.  

I head west and the bridge is out but we go for the old drive fast enough and land on the other side.  I have to make two skill rolls to avoid a horrible crash but make them and get rewarded with.... another T-Junction.  This time west or south.  I decide to keep going west.

I find a lone biker flagging me down.  At this point I am worried about two things.  1, I need to find petrol so ill have to do something.   And 2, this blog is going to be very boring.  Well I am repaid for this by having a grenade lobbed at the car.  I pass a luck test and only lose 2 stamina points and now end up in a fire fight with two bikers.

Now if you get hit even once you lose a skill point which is brutal.  Lucky they don't hit me at all.  But it was a long, long battle.  I had a skill advantage of five over the second guy but my I kept rolling terribly for damage and they have a lot of stamina!

And of course I get nothing for this at all and continue on.  I arrive at another blockade where I am forced south but first I can look at the cars.  Hopefully there is some petrol here so ill have a look.  And in good news it does indeed result in finding a full can of petrol.   

I head south and once more get the dreaded T-Junction and its south or east.  I decide to keep heading south for just now.  And already I have to use my precious fuel canister and I am back to being on the look out.

Its night time and I get a few options, I decide to pull off the road and sleep in the interceptor.  This appears to be a good decision as I get two stamina points back.  Alas as I travel south it turns out the road is mined and I hit one which takes a chunk of the interceptors armour off.  Luckily though the engine is not damaged and I am able to start it before any of the outlaws turn up.

The terrain starts to become more desert like and I get the option to keep going or turn east.  I think going south is triggering petrol checks so I gamble and go east, only to be told in fact you turn left toward San Angelo anyway in the next paragraph.  

I come to a railway bridge and a nutter drops a pillar from it which my amazing driving skill helps me avoid.  I decide to go after the attacker as he needs taught a lesson.

He looks less wild and crazed and more like a race car driver.

He buggers off on a motor bike so I decide to have a look around his caravan.  In revenge I eat his corned beef and take a grenade.  Again I arrive at a dreaded junction so instead of going south I decide to head west to find some fuel.  And yet again in the next paragraph I get told I turn towards San Angelo anyway.  Starting to feel a bit railroaded here.

I find another interceptor.  Id like to think this was another person playing Freeway Fighter but did not do as well.

I take the wheel as another spare meaning I have 3 now.  No idea where these are stored as my car has only 1 and its a space saver!  I look inside and get bit by a rattlesnake.  Luckily I have plenty med kits but it does cost me a skill point which is a disaster.  I am told I gleefully shoot the snake in revenge and my reward?  Some plastic tubing.

As I trundle onwards I am accosted by a bike and side car with machine gun.  I am told that they are wearing a cap and flying goggles like old pilots with scarves over their mouths.

Yeah that's exactly what he is wearing.

I decide instead of a straight fight to dive into my box of tricks and deploy a canister of spikes.  These fools go straight over them and puncture two tires and go off into the sand and I easily leave them behind.  

And then it happens, I get another fuel check and I do not have any.  The Interceptor judders to a halt and I am forced to walk back to New Hope (or San Angelo if its closer) on foot.  Well at least I didn't die!

Notable Encounters - 

One of the more interesting locations is the farmhouse - 

Erm..honestly its notable!

The blandest of bland illustrations does not do justice to the biker gangs base which have an alarming amount of bazookas.  No problem though as we have rocket launchers in the car.  Just blow up the outhouse and its fine to roam around.  Its got an old shop and of course booby traps but most importantly this is where we find Sinclair!  Who just says thanks for rescuing him, asks you to radio home to tell them he is on his way and then jumps on a Harley and buggers off.

Probably the best encounter before the end sequence is the Blitz race.

Its more exciting than it looks!

The reward is a vital can of petrol but god knows how much you actually use up trying to win the race in the first place!  Anyway you race against a yellow ford and its actually quite a long sequence where you have to make decisions such as when to brake, accelerate, ram, use weapons or veer to block him getting past you.  Its well done and feels very frantic.  Just remember which gang you tell Chuck Norris you belong to as he will test you on it later!

This guy thinks he is a roman.

The dude is riding around as a centurion on a chariot.  Its very random but at least it is a little bit different.  However not that we would know he is riding a chariot as we do not get to see it!  Or his fancy gun!

Ignoring the background, this is pretty cool!

Its a battle with a helicopter!  It is quite disappointing though that its just a standard battle.  I feel this could have been an epic film style battle.  But  guess its a shame you only have 400 paragraphs to work with.....oh wait.

This is not that notable but I wanted to include Leonardi's amazing illustration.

It is quite a boring race and feels tacked on after the thrill of the blitz race.  It is a bit different though where you just roll dice and first one to get to 24 wins.  Again though, massive waste of petrol!

Things pick up in the final part of the book.  In true Mungo fashion we get a companion - 

Amber lasts longer than Mungo but is equally useless..kind of

She takes you to the Doom Dogs camp, and its quite a good segment.  Amber of course almost blows it by knocking over a stone potentially giving you away.  But the whole camp location is enjoyable and feels like a climatic finale.  Except its not the end.

That of course will surely be the epic battle at San Angelo between the residents and the remaining Doom Dogs!

Frantic fast paced action!

Its not actually that exciting.  The big battle in Lizard King was much more exciting.  Its a poor version of that.

Oh and thats also not then end, we have to drive the tanker back to New Hope.  Now that is anti climatic!

Artwork - 

Oh boy.  Right let me start with the disclaimer.  The original art for Freeway Fighter was rejected.  So our artist Kevin Bulmer had nine days (Yes NINE!) to do all the artwork as a favor to Ian Livingston.  So taking that into account its a pretty amazing job.  And its not all bad.

I mean this is a great Chuck Norris!

I also like the helicopter! But we have to be honest, it shows that it was only nine days.  As most of it is terrible.  I mean just look at things like the farmhouse!

Amber is actually a human and not a strange robot.

The bosses car does not even all fit in the page.  Amazing night scene as well.

Do I even need to keep typing?

Please make it stop!

It makes you think how bad was the original artwork that it got binned in favor of this!?

Now tell me, what are looking at here?

If you said A blockade made out of tree logs with a laser gun then I can tell you have already played Freeway Fighter.

I have to give particular love for the detailed backgrounds - 

Now it would be ok if this was just a little doodle in the background.  But in all of these this was the complete sum total of the background!  Lesson learned, nine days is not enough time for a job this big.

The Big Bad - 

Again not a real big bad here but I am going to go with the leader of the Doom Dogs!  The Animal!  

A big buff bad dude!

He is a tough skill 11 fight.  With studded gloves so he takes off two stamina!  Hope you have brass knucks to match it!  But what I like about this fight is you do not have to end up in a fist fight with him.  Instead you can end up in a firefight with his goons.  Once you defeat them he comes out and grabs you.  And Amber clocks him over the head with a wrench or something.  So maybe she was not as bad as Mungo!  As for his motivations, he is just a bad guy.

Menagerie - 

This might be the shortest menagerie section ever!  Its just a lot of highwaymen, bikers and gang bangers!  Sometimes you come across a Wild Dog or some Wolves.  Its much more vehicle orientated but even then there is not a lot of variety.  Lets give a shout out to this guy though - 

Look at the intensity of his eyes!

Its not even a combat haha!  He just throws rats at you and runs away!  However it does lead to an entertaining death!

Entertaining Deaths - 

So not sure if you are aware but you might run out of fuel.

You can also fail by giving they keys to the interceptor to various guys, such as -

Giving the keys away when mugged at Joes garage.

Giving the keys to a man at a booby trapped ambulance.

Giving the keys to bikers at a road block.

Basically do not give the keys away.

Getting shot by a laser gun (in this world) pointing out of a log blockade.

Everyone in San Angelo just giving up when you get attacked.

Driving into sand dunes.

But my favorite is of course after the aforementioned rat man.  If you get bit by a rat you find out just before you make it back to New Hope with the tanker that you have the plague.  In a great act of self sacrifice you leave the tanker with a note explaining what happened and flee into the wilderness.  This ending gets you a statue!  And actually is better than the "good" ending!

Pete's Corner - 

With 2022 Petrol Prices this was very realistic!

 
Final Thoughts - 

Well from my playthrough this was not the most fun.  Rolling up stats for the interceptor was cool and having all the cool toys for the car made for an exciting start.  

But a lot of it is as dry as the desert you are in.  It is so repetitive both with enemies and encounters which shows how limiting the theme can actually be.   Maybe they could have done something a bit more fantastical with the dystopian setting with mutants and monsters.

The blandness is shown in the art.  We have talked about the issues with it and how it came to be but unfortunately it really does bring the whole book down.  A lot of it does not even match the descriptions in the text.  Its Starship Traveler bad and I do not say that lightly.

The book does pick up after you meet Amber, its a shame as I feel she could have been used more but it feels like she is bolted on.  But the run from the Doom Dogs camp to the end is much better and they have much longer and descriptive paragraphs.  If the rest of the book had been like this it would have been much better!

Disappointingly it is only 380 paragraphs in length which is poor.  I could understand if there was a lot longer descriptions and detail in the encounters but this is not the case for the majority of the book.  

The ending while not as bad as Space Assassin is pretty terrible.  It is a couple of lines saying the petrol really helped out and if you rescued Sinclair even better.  Sinclair was a missed opportunity.  How he ended up ahead of you makes no sense and he could have helped more when you found him.  Or it could have had a lot more details finding him.  Anyway it could have been fleshed out a lot more and even used as a companion for a bit.

The world of course makes no sense!  Its absolutely riddled with people just waiting around with traps for any travelers that happen to be going by.  But who is travelling around to sustain all these people?  All of them would be long dead from starvation.  

I did however enjoy the blitz race, it was much more detailed and the sequence leading up to the animal fight was quite good.  The new rules were an interesting take as well and I really enjoyed the oil cans, spikes and missiles.  However stamina is high and it needs to be for the shooting rules but it can also make combat drag out if you roll low consistently for damage.  

There is not enough variety though between the different types of combat.  Hand to Hand, Shooting and Vehicle all feel very similar.  But of course the real killer is the ridiculous need for fuel.  Yes its realistic but god it is boring looking for fuel.  Also why are you sent out on a mission with a car that has no chance of getting there without multiple fuel stops when there is no fuel to be found.  Not a fan of realism in a series called Fighting Fantasy.  

And how is everyone else driving around and racing and flying helicopters if petrol is such a rare resource?!

So all in all some really good ideas within the book but sadly they are never fleshed out to their potential.

Score - 4 out of 10.